Compassion-Focused Parent Training (CFPT)

Dr. Adam S. Weissman
Founding President & Chief Psychologist
The Child & Family Institute and Weissman Children’s Foundation
www.childfamilyinstitute.com  

Compassion-Focused Parent Training (CFPT)

A gentle, evidence-based model for supporting parents and families

CFPT was developed by Dr. Adam S. Weissman, Founding President and Chief Psychologist of The Child & Family Institute and Weissman Children’s Foundation.

It brings together the strongest evidence-based parenting strategies with a compassionate, parent-centered therapeutic approach. CFPT helps caregivers build confidence, reduce shame, understand emotional roadblocks, and strengthen their relationship with their child.

What Makes CFPT Different

Most parenting programs teach skills in a structured, didactic format. These methods tend to focus on the child as the “identified patient,” placing the parent in the role of behavior-changer without addressing the parent’s own emotional history or therapeutic needs.

This can leave many parents feeling:

• blamed

• judged

• overwhelmed

• ashamed

• resistant

• perfectionistic

CFPT takes a different path. It recognizes that every parent arrives with their own psychological, cultural, and intergenerational experiences. Those histories directly shape:

• their views on parenting

• their strengths and challenges

• their comfort with change

• their attachment style

• their ability to use parenting skills consistently

CFPT builds a warm, trusting, collaborative relationship between parent and therapist. That relationship becomes the foundation for real, lasting change.

Why the Parent–Therapist Relationship Matters

CFPT sees the therapy relationship as a microcosm of the parent–child relationship. The same processes that help a parent feel safe, supported, and empowered in therapy help children feel secure at home.

Key elements include:

• empathy

• trust

• compassion

• cultural humility

• non-judgmental validation

• consistency and structure

• normalizing and de-stigmatizing difficult emotions

• therapist modeling imperfection, vulnerability, and repair

• appropriate self-disclosure and “joining”

When parents experience these qualities in session, they become more able to offer them to their children. That creates healthier patterns of attachment, communication, and emotional safety within the entire family system.

Module 1: Introduction to CFPT

1.1 Foundations of CFPT

CFPT blends two essential components:

1. Evidence-based parenting strategies

Tools drawn from CBT, DBT, behavioral parent training, and positive reinforcement systems.

2. Compassion-focused therapy for caregivers

A space to explore and address parental experiences such as:

• shame

• trauma

• anxiety

• perfectionism

• insecure attachment

• cultural and racial stressors

CFPT helps parents understand how their history shows up in their parenting and works to remove emotional roadblocks that make skill use difficult.

1.2 Mirroring: The Relationship as a Model

CFPT uses the therapist–parent bond as a mirror for rebuilding the parent–child relationship.

Through the therapist’s consistent, compassionate presence, parents learn to:

• regulate emotions

• tolerate imperfection

• manage stress

• respond rather than react

• build security and trust

This “inside-out” model creates safety for parents, which in turn helps them create safety for their children.

Module 2: Caregiver Empowerment & the Therapeutic Relationship

2.1 Addressing Shame, Trauma, Anxiety & Perfectionism

Parents often carry unresolved emotional experiences that affect how they respond to their children. CFPT gently helps parents explore:

• intergenerational trauma

• insecure attachment patterns

• schemas and modes from Schema Therapy

• shame and self-criticism

• cultural and racial experiences

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• anxiety and fear of “getting it wrong”

Therapeutic tools include:

• CBT for thoughts and self-doubt

• DBT for emotion regulation

• Shame-Resilience strategies

• Attachment-based work

2.2 Building Trust, Compassion & Empowerment

CFPT strengthens the parent’s identity as a capable, compassionate caregiver through techniques such as:

• re-parenting and self-compassion exercises

• normalizing imperfection

• collaborative problem-solving

• radical compassion and non-judgment

• appropriate therapist self-disclosure

• modeling vulnerability and emotion regulation

Parents learn to empower their children by first experiencing empowerment themselves.

Section 3: Compassion-Focused Parenting Practices

3.1 Core Goals

CFPT helps caregivers:

• use evidence-based parenting skills with warmth

• improve attachment, connection, and emotional safety

• reduce child anxiety and behavioral challenges

• build consistency, structure, and predictable routines

• strengthen self-esteem for both parent and child

Role-play and therapist modeling help parents practice new skills in real time.

3.2 Positive Parenting Skills

Skills commonly taught in CFPT include:

• evidence-based assessment

• psychoeducation on child development

• understanding the “4-Factor Model”

• 1-on-1 special time

• praise and reinforcement

• active/strategic ignoring

• effective instructions

• rewards systems

• house rules and structure

These skills help reduce problem behaviors and increase positive interactions.

3.3 Individualized Treatment Planning

Parents receive personalized guidance based on:

• their child’s temperament and needs

• family dynamics

• cultural context

• caregiver emotional patterns

Support includes:

• role-play and live coaching

• reducing shame and stigma

• reframing behavior as communication

• celebrating incremental progress

• providing handouts and visual tools (e.g., MATCH-ADTC)

Progress is monitored with evidence-based measures such as:

• Parent Empowerment & Efficacy Measure

• Brief Feelings Survey

• Top Problems

• Child Trauma Screen

• Therapeutic Alliance Scale for Children

• Clinician Cultural Sensitivity & Satisfaction Questionnaire

Concluding with Compassion

Compassion-Focused Parent Training is a comprehensive, integrative model that combines the best of behavioral science with deep compassion for the caregiver’s lived experience.

By strengthening the parent–therapist relationship, supporting parents emotionally, and teaching practical, evidence-based skills, CFPT creates meaningful, lasting change within the interconnected parent–child–family system.

Parents leave therapy feeling more confident, less alone, and more capable of guiding their children with warmth, structure, and self-compassion.